Being strong

devon 7 years ago

1 reply

This is second time round for my older sisters breast cancer and as a result she has had a double mastectomy and have just been told there is also cancer in her lymph nodes,   i have been her carer all the way through.   As things have progressed i bave found it harder and harder to surpress my sadness and distress at what i am watching happen to my sister, every day ,every appointment is a battle to stay in control and take the lead for my sister.  These feelings come with a huge amount of guilt ...After all i am not the one with cancer...  I have researched for helplines where i maybe able to talk to someone about my feelings rather than keep it bottled up but i am finding it hard to find a servicd that provides this.

Support 7 years ago

Hi Devon,

I’m sorry to hear about your sister’s cancer reoccurrence and what you are both going through. Guilt is an emotion often mentioned by families. Supporting a loved one through a serious illness can be emotionally and physically draining and it is not unusual for a carer to find that they are struggling with what is happening. We have information about coping with feelings which you may find helpful here: https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/being-there/helping-someone-cope/dealing-with-feelings .

The closer you are to someone the harder it may be to witness what the changes in them.  It is important to take time to look after yourself. Many people tell us that talking to someone can be helpful. At the Support Line we can offer you emotional support and a listening ear.

If you would like to talk about things in more detail please call our Free phone Support Line on 0800 090 2309, or drop us a line via Web Chat:

https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help

Best Wishes

Clare (Marie Curie Support Line)