Need advise & help

mw1970 9 years ago

1 reply

Hello everyone

My mum was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer 8 weeks ago which originally diagnosed as a minor stroke which lost us time , she is at stage 4 already and is recieving palliative care , she lives with my sister and her boyfriend , i live 100 miles away and am struggling with my job and dealing with all this , i was signed off with stress 4 weeks ago and went back to work today as things were calm-ish and thought id make the effort with work till things got bad but tonight had all call off my sister who is having a breakdown about the situation and also my mum who wants to see me as she had results from a course of radiotherapy which hasnt touched the cancer , she is going into hospital tomorrow to have her lung drained due to fluid ....i`ve been down to see mum & sister several times but am worried about work as i need to go back down to support the both of them , i know it sound ridiculas at a time like this but im worried about my job , i have a family and everything that goes with it, this is all getting too much for me ...help !!

MarkWilkin 9 years ago

Edited by MarkWilkin 9 years ago

Sorry that you and your family are going through such a difficult time. There are a few things that might help make things easier for your sister, your mum and yourself.  

I'd recommend reading our pages on Getting support and looking after yourself as a carer to you and your sister, as making sure you've got the support you need and looking after yourself is important to make sure you're able to be there for your mum.

We also have some information on Flexible working and Taking time off in an emergency which I hope will help with your worries about work. 

Your sister and mum should certainly get in touch with their GP or district nurse if they haven't already, as they'll be able to refer to our nursing service if it's the kind of help that they need right now. Their GP or district nurse should also be able to point them towards any local help they're able to ask for. You can also search for local support on our website and in the Carers UK local directory.

Our helper service might also be useful, as they can help out in the home a few hours a week. You can read some details on what they can help with here.

Take care